This is my own little section of the Order of Thelemic Knights website. This is where I share more of me rather than material on Thelema or OTK topics. Please read my Disclosure and Comment Policy for more information.
We’ve all been hurt. We’ve all broken things in our lives. Many of these hurts or breaks can and have been healed or fixed, but there remains in each of us, at least one hurt or break that has never quite healed or been fixed completely and probably never can be. Sometimes the best we can do is patch these open wounds to keep them from festering and ultimately infecting and ruining our lives. That’s what My Duct Tape Life is about. Patching the wounds that never quite heal.
I’m sure some will wonder what qualifies me to write about such things. Well, first and foremost, I’m a human being. I’m a man who freely admits that I have several such wounds. I discuss them openly and honestly. Sometimes brutally honestly because let’s face it, sometimes truth is fucking brutal. I never hide behind some false sense of “macho” in order to appear stronger than I really am. Don’t think for one second that this is a sign of weakness. Some feel that a man who discusses feelings and admits being in pain, whether physically or emotionally, is weak. Frankly, that’s a huge load of bullshit. It’s easier, not to mention cowardly, to lie about or cover up such things. It takes true inner strength to face these issues head on openly and honestly.
As you look around the My Duct Tape Life area a bit, you will discover that I am a recovered addict, note that I said recovered and not recovering. A large part of what I write about here is addiction and recovery. I make no apologies and I am not the least bit embarrassed. It is a part of my life that although a terrible place to be, also played its part in making me who I am today. Note that everything I write about addiction and recovery is based on my own personal experience, thoughts and opinions. Again, I refer you to my Disclosure and Comment Policy.
You can read much more about this in a series of posts I have written called Recovery Is NOT For Quitters… My goal with this series is simply to reach out to those who may be struggling with addiction and have not yet taken any steps to get help, and perhaps provide a different perspective to those who are getting help but still struggling. If even one person benefits from reading this series then I feel I will have accomplished this goal.
I am also very interested in spirituality, as should be obvious considering the site I share my writing with you. In college I majored in Computer Information Systems and minored in World Religion. Bit of an odd combination to be sure but there it is. I have many and varied experiences in the spiritual world and thoroughly enjoy writing about and discussing them.
I write poetry sometimes, short stories and other things. I also sometimes write for the Order of Thelemic Knights, but you probably already knew that.
What do I want to accomplish with My Duct Tape Life? My goal is twofold. First, this is good for me! Second, it is my hope that my experience, openness and honesty will be helpful to anyone going through similar experiences.
To Know, Know, Know Me Is To…
Love, Love… yeah… I’ll just stop right there.
I’m fairly eclectic, that’s a fancy word that really just means I sometimes lack focus in choosing what I write about. I write poetry, short stories in several genres, tutorials, there is also the proverbial novel that I have been writing since I was about 22 years old, now I’m… well, older, and the novel is still incomplete. I assisted in writing procedure manuals for the community college I attended before University. The procedure manuals are the only writings that have found their way into hands other than my own until now. No one reads procedure manuals anyway right?
I love writing and have since I was just a wee lad. It’s only been recently that I’ve somewhat revealed the goings on inside my head to an unsuspecting world. Up to now, I had always feared rejection or ridicule. These days? It simply doesn’t matter. See, there are two kinds of people in the world. There are those who will love what I write and heap oodles and oodles of praise and affection upon me; then there are those who will not like anything I’ve written. They are simply wrong and you should probably avoid this type of person. KIDDING!
In my 50+ years…dammit! I went and spilled the beans there didn’t I? Dammit! So, moving right along… In my life I’ve been called many things. Some were not very flattering and I was almost always the one calling me them. In high school, much to my abhorrence, my nickname was Waldo. Let me just say that anyone who calls me that now is immediately placed on my poopie list, and trust me, you don’t want to be on that list. Please note the intimation of a not so veiled and completely worthless threat.
One day a friend of mine said to me, “You know what you are? You’re the uncarved block!” I immediately said, “Gee thanks, you’re a blockhead too!” He then tried to explain what he meant by that and ended up just telling me to read The Tao Of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff. I did so and loved it. I cannot think of a more fitting description of who I am and I am certainly not embarrassed to be considered one! Uncarved block is a loose translation of the Chinese word pu. It can also be translated as ‘unhewn log’ or ‘simplicity.’ Pu is pronounced ‘pooh’ just as in Winnie The Pooh, who just happens to be my all time favorite uncarved block.
From Wikipedia: “Pu represents a passive state of receptiveness. It is a symbol for a state of pure potential and perception without prejudice. In this state, one can see things as they are, without preconceptions or illusions. It is believed to be the true nature of the mind, unburdened by knowledge or experiences. In the state of pu, there is no right or wrong, beautiful or ugly. There is only pure experience, or awareness, free from learned labels and definitions. It is this state of being that is the goal…”
Yeah, I can handle being pu. It’s probably not a good idea to say that out loud in front of other people though. They may misunderstand and call some people who will bring you a new white coat with very long sleeves and an oddly placed belt.
I’m very glad you are here and I look forward to hearing your thoughts and opinions on the subjects I write about. So jump on in and maybe we can learn something from each other. Stranger things have happened… just look at the platypus… I mean look at it!
Thanks for stopping by and now back to our regularly scheduled chaos…